A clear and present past to help paint the future.

Salutations people! It has been over 3 months since my last confession on here. As always, no matter how badly i want to put it to print, time gets away and before you know it I'm making excuses as to why I haven't laid it down sooner. So much has gone down since July, that it's literally too much to do now. What inspired my writings today is that when I refelct on a recent trip to Las Vegas for a life long friends' Wedding, and the time spent with a select group of old friends; it made me realize how well the past and present have so much relevance with my future. The present made me think about the past, and collectively they helped remind me just how blessed I am.

To be asked in the Spring if I would attend a friends Wedding that I have known since the first day of 5th grade was to me quite an honor. In the last few years, we have done alot of catching up and got to meet one anothers' special someone and embraced the opportunity to remain close now well into our adult lives. The Wedding was held in one of my favorite places, and a small group of our friends made it out for the trip, as well. Some of them I see relatively often, some not so often, and I was really glad to see someone I hadn't since high school. When you get a group like that together, there are really only two things you can talk about; the past and the present. That common bond is a great outlet and gives the opportunity to here things from another person's perspective (with the benefit of hindsight, as well) and you can often see things differently that you had always captured one way for so long. Tiff's Husband Keith is a dynamite guy from what I have gathered, and to see not only her, but her children happy was a tremendous feeling, and I look forward to seeing first hand what the future holds in store for them.

During the reception, Amanda, a friend since elementary school made the assumption that many people from those days do, and asked how my best friend from childhood was doing. It was a safe assumption, because we were inseperable for many years, went through so much together (good and bad), and to a casual onlooker had the type of bond that seemingly would never be broke. Sadly, as it often goes for so many people, we did lose contact not long after high school. I had to answer Amanda the same way I have everyone else; "I really don't know much other than he is married, has two girls(karma) and a boy...beautiful family, good job and home." That's not to say a bond was broke, as he could call me out of the blue anytime, tell me he needed my help, and would unquestionably get it. I did try for many years to make attempts to find him; really just to see how his life was and just let him know that the memories from us growing up are some of the best of my life, and thank him for that. I did in fact find his little Sister, who was like my little Sister in many regards, too! It was a simple say hello, become friends on "The Facebook" and nothing since. It had become apparent to me that some people are just more prepared to focus on the present and future, and leave the past where it is. We all have to do that one way or another, and I completely understand that. As adults, we have to move forward the way we see as best for ourselves and more often than not, for their families.

Karen, his little Sister, all grown up and married with her first child on the way, did grant me passage to her world which did let me into Brian's a little bit. Photo albums give me the opportunity to see first hand how their entire family has come along, and expanded after all these years. Though I would love to have established contact on a larger level, it is quite fulfilling to see that the whole family (which was like my 2nd family) has persevered through some hard times, and stayed together. It makes me feel good about their future, and mine...

My past and present have been documented in this blog sporatically, but not completely updated. About two weeks after my last entry, I met a woman who has changed my life and made me feel complete in ways no other had before. I truly believe that my search is over and our future looks outstanding! I was told by a friend during my last breakup, which was very bad, that "it should be easy." At the time I felt like telling her to piss off, that she didn't know anything about it, and to leave me alone. Well Val, I stand corrected, and completely understand what you mean. Everyday brings along it's own set of obstacles, but together we easily conquer all, and look forward to what each day does bring us. We have done the family thing, and fortunately her parents don't think I'm an asshole (or if they do, I admire their restraint...though I'm not so sure about her sister???), mine love her and that's a fact, because they wouldn't be tight lipped, otherwise! MB, you are a show-stopper, and I'm glad you are off the market!

You may ask yourself, how did I get here (credit David Byrne-Talking Heads)???
Though all of this may not seem to tie together, for me; it does. Alot of who I am ties in with who I was and who I want to be. For some reason the sanctity and happiness of others I hold dear helps paint a clearer picture of things to come for me. It is my hope that one day sooner, when I am married and starting a family of my own, that: I will have friends at my Wedding who have known me most all of my life and we can carry on as we all did at Tiffany and Keith's, that when I have children the people presently in our lives can be apart of the families future, and...that those from the past who are off of my radar may get curious one day, and through the marvels of modern technology look on from afar and see how far I've come, where I'm going, and get a little bit of joy and nostalgia from who we once were, when all of these things were the furthest thing from our minds.

This writing was for you all; Ken, Trish, Brian, Mike and Karen...Thanks!

A Mid Summer Nights Report

It has been awhile since I last blogged on here, and I'm gonna do things a little different than you would typically see. There are alot of things that have sparked my interest this year, so far. In just a week I will be doing a family week @ the beach. I'm very much looking forward to decompressing a bit and enjoying the quiet time with them. The summer up to now, it's midpoint, has been much busier than I usually prefer. Certain things kind of fell in my lap out of nowhere, which leads me to believe the cosmos aligned for a reason, and I shouldn't pass up the opportunities. Not much else to say here, so I'm just gonna get to brass tax; The mid-summer report.

Thoughts on...

-Le bron James is a grown man who contractually has the right to sign with ANY team willing to negotiate an NBA contract with him. Now, with that being said, I would have preferred seeing him stay in Cleveland. Or, at least have the decency to let them know that he would not be returning minutes before he tells the world on national television. I'm not going to get into the primetime special, as I can just sum it up as horse shit. The last two months of overkill made it lackluster for me, and I didn't even change the channel to see what happened. My ESPN newsreel text app sent it to me. By then it was very clear where he was going, and looking at it without reading into any of the details, believe it is the best move possible. He can focus on playing basketball and not having to dominate a game for 42 mins a night. I have a strange feeling the 3 of them wanted this from the onset, and why is that such a bad thing. I remember a few years ago when KG got his shot @ gold, along with the Celtics other acquisition; Ray Allen. "The Boston 3 Party" and even their Coach, Doc Rivers, who deliberately tanked a half a season to position the brokering of this monumental deal that led to a Triumphant Championship. KG cried his way out of Minnesota, with little dignity, but recieved nothing but praise when he made the move. Le bron James has had his name run through the mud by many, including his former employer, through a very sophmoric post on the Cavaliers' website. These three talented guys collectively decided to follow the mold of Boston, and are in some cases 10 years younger than the TB3P. This could work, or could implode. If all goes well, just how many titles could they win? Time will tell...

The underwater drilling project gone wrong:
I have alot of opinions on many elements of this story on their own, such as; underwater drilling, the cavalier uproach of our nations gov't, and the Gulf of Mexico is a place I spent a great part of my life. It was literally my backyard, and the next time I see it (in a few weeks), the eco system could already be comprimised. I'm really pissed off about this example of greed personified, and really want to just leave this one at that. It's just so sad to see the world make the same mistakes over and over again. We are stripping this Mother Earth of all of her nourishments, so she is fighting back now a la earthquakes, tsunamis, hurricanes and so on...It would appear the idea is to go until there is nothing left...

The Phils:
It has been a real rough stretch as of late with many inconsistencies. There is no doubt they can still win not only the division, but the NL. As of right now, barring all injuries, we aren't good enough to beat the upper echelon of the AL. Hitting has been streaky, starting pitching is good but not great, and the bullpen......................................(dramatic pause continues).................good lord. Even with all the flaws, they are still the best. But don't be fooled; the NL is better than they have been in awhile. The emergence of teams like Cincinatti and San Diego, the return of Atlanta, Colorado and St. Louis; they will have to kick and scratch (like they did before they became Champions of the World) to stay among the elite. I'm still with you fellas, but a few words of advice:
1. Do not trade away any of the starting players on this team. Do not accept failure mid season, as we are right on course precicely the way we were the last 2 years...DO WORK!
2. Ruben Amaro Jr.- Kiss my ass.
3. Jamie Moyer- You continue to inspire so many, and your brilliance the last several starts has been nothing short of entertaining and impressive. Any young pitcher that has had the opportunity to be in the rotation with him will boast of what a giving teacher he is a swell. That makes him the most valuable guy there...no offense Roy, cause you are The Man!

Music, shows, etc...
I had the honor of going to see Faith No More on one of only 6 U.S. dates before they call it quits again, this time likely for good. I spent time with great friends, made some new ones, and drank Tecates and alot of John Dalys. lol Also, while tailgating James put on John Frusciante's solo album "The Empyrian". It is deep, but now that I have heard the whole thing am very into the sound. Mike Patton and the guys really put together a great show for us in Philly, on a beautiful night outside at The Mann. I sat dead center and just zoned out into the show. The music brought back some great memories from all different times in my life, and created a couple new ones in the process. Great show, so glad that I went. Also, I'm a little late on these guys, as I typically am. But, The Airborne Toxic Event is my new sounds I'm listening to. I saw their show @ The Bat Bar in Austin, TX from 2008 on DirecTV 101 and really dug what they where doing. The music is very hard to categorize as it pulls from soo many genres, such as; Rockabilly, Country, Synth Pop, Brit glam rock, emo (I know, but somehow it works) and alternative. Other than that, sticking with the classics for the sountrack of my summer. Alot of Bob Seger and The Silver Bullet Band, Phil Collins, The 'Stand by Me' and 'Reality Bites' soundtracks, Jim Croce, The Clash, Buffalo Springfield and of course, The Boss himself...

That's all I've got for now. Keep it tight and Do Work!

Conan The Barbarian I am not!

How many people in the world want to live a better, healthier life, but "don't know how to?" I would assume far too many, which is indicative of the most recent update on global obeisity statistics provided by NationMaster.com. As many people would have safely guessed, The U.S. takes the honor of being #1 (this is not a good thing) in obeisity out of ALL the countries in the world! The U.S. is listed @ 30.6% of the nation is overweight. Now, I am too cynical to believe that number is balls on accurate (how exactly do they come to these conclusive #'s?), but I am willing to believe it is higher. Perhaps not overweight, but not fit or healthy. There are so many reasons for such a staggering factoid, and it doesn't take a panel of experts to pinpoint many of the contributing factors. Though some of my friends call me "The Doctor", I am not a Doctor of medicine, or nutrition...just Awesomeness! lol What I am getting at is that we all know in general right from wrong, and what is good and bad for our bodies. Some would be less obvious, but for F's sake; drinking a 2 liter of soda (diet or reg), eating bread w/every meal, fried food late night @ a Pub and housing a pint of Ben & Jerry's "Americone Dream" is NOT GOOD for you! One of the biggest problems that plagues the U.S. is how good marketers of products got at turning us into an "eye appeal" society. How many times have you walked into a place, saw a picture of something making it look like the most phenomenal thing to catch your attention all day, and you/someone with you simply said: "I WANT THAT!" Not knowing anything about the product, just that you need to have it. Let's say for example you are @ TGIFridays and that said 3'x4' glossy picture is a dessert they are promoting...it is ordered, delivered and the serving dish is lapped clean, and another person at the table happens to stumble across the dessert menu on the table (which in NYC and Philadelphia now requires mandatory nutritionals be posted), and blurts out "Holy shit Mildred (ex.) that brownie sundae you just ate has 1,200 calories and 200 of them are from fat!" This happens all over the country, every single day! The term "Let the buyer beware" isn't just a clever catchphrase...it is an opportunity provided to us to seek the best option for our needs. For example, you aren't going to go to a car dealership, look at a poster of a Chevy Suburban and point to it like a five year old and say "I want that" to the dealer. OK, if you are of the minority and would do that with a $50,000 vehicle you are either a professional athlete or a complete idiot! What I am trying to convey through all of this is that the I believe life is all about choices; and we all have choices with what we consume. Don't let Coca Cola tell you what you want to drink because Beyonce and her backup dancers do some clever little commercial where they make a can of soda look alot better than it really is, or some fake football player get his bell rung and think he's Batman(which is ridiculous-we all know Christian Bale is Batman, and by the looks of him he scoffs @ Snickers bars while checking out @ the supermarket), take a bite of a Snickers bar and all is well...cause it's not!

So, let's review what we have learned today: The key to getting started on the path to treating your body as a temple (as we all should), is to simply sift through the bullshit and take the time to know what is good for you, and what isn't good for you (or what you can do without). Believe me when I tell you (and most who have known me for a long time can confirm) that I am not and have not ever been the next Jack Lalaine in training, or been in a Mr.Universe pageant. But, I have always known right from wrong when it comes to my body and what is put in it. My lifestyle has been so up and down as far as the kind of shape I have been in over the years (nothing like that GD Oprah Winfrey), and it took facing serious health problems (gall bladder disease, chronic pancreatitis, and hypothyroid) for me to truly take a stance and evaluate how I am treating my temple. I can honestly say that the last year or two is the closest I have been to my peak top shape condition that I was in when I was a competetive athlete. I know what my goals are, and I am going to achieve them because when I set my mind to something an oncoming train can't derail me! I challenge you all to do the same with your lives; workout a life plan, set reasonable goals, think for yourself (NO EYE APPEAL EATING) and most important-let others help you. Get advise from others who have gone through (or currently are) going through lifestyle changes, let their testimonials and knowledge not only educate you, but inspire you to get where you want to be. It is only beneficial to have such people in your life and be part of your support system. I may not aspire to have 6 or 8 pack abs (I spend alot of hard earned $$$ on Miller Lite Security Co. to protect them) on display, I know they are there, but I do want to eat well, live well, encourage others to do the same, and evolve as a human race.

I have started a group on Facebook called "The Buddy System" and it is geared towards exactly what I just wrote about above. The idea is that we aren't all experts in nutrition, fitness, and healthy culinary prowess. But collectively, through a large network of people of all sizes, lifestyles and goals, we can help one another out...hence "The Buddy System." The page is open for all to publish recipes, restaurants in their area(s) to recommend to others, workout tips, and hopefully ALOT of testimonials. Members also have the ability to post pictures of their journeys towards a better life, and I hope they take full advantage of that. You truly never know how your story can be beneficial to others until you tell it. Hope to see you there. I'm just sayin'....

What's on tap for April?

It has become clear to me that when you are a scatter-brained maniac like myself who also has an insanely busy schedule, maintaining a blog (or 3 like I aspire to do) is alot of work. I have so many ideas and topics I would love to cover, but prioritizing is key because some involve a bit of research. A few things to expect through the month of April will be; my thoughts on the NCAA tournament, summer concert tours already announced along with any new noteworthy music to come out, review of gluten free beers, the launch of the Phils' 2010 World Champonship campaign, and...on a far more serious note I will be piecing together a story on the new "Flash Mob" nonsense that has begun to already piss me off! Hopefully, that fad will have run it's course by the time I get to it before something very bad happens. Finally, my primary focus for April will be a running, open forum on living a better, healthy life. From the foods you (and your children) eat, to the way you work out, we as a whole need to address the toxic epidemic that has comprimised the quality of life for so many, for too long. Until then, I'm gonna watch some college basketball till my eyes bleed! Be good to each other, and be Awesome! I'm just sayin'...

I've got a new "Ratitude!"

Salutations, my fellow humans, and welcome to another installment of things in the world that I find awesome. Music has always been an inspiring and 'driving' force in my life, and since the current trend on this blog is to cover such things there is no better time to talk about Weezer's 7th studio album, 2009's "Ratitude." My friend, um...we'll call him "Laser", came up to me one day in early November 2009 and asked me very casually if I had picked up the new Weezer album yet? I responded in a very arrogant tone that "The Red Album" wasn't new, and that he needed to get up to speed with his music. Well, my name certainly was Mudd after that one because there were singles already released for this phantom album as early as August. The only radio I listen to these days tend to be NPR, Howard, Bubba TLS, Dan Patrick and local sports. Thus, I missed a few months of the goodness that is 'Ratitude.' But once I got my hands on it I never put it down, as it is still my top music played in rotation some 5 months later. Because of the great balance in the feel of the music from the start of track 1 to the conclusion of "The Underdogs" (Deluxe edition), Weezer's 'Ratitude' may be my favorite album of the decade. It's almost hard to believe that it's been over 15 years since I heard Weezer for the first time on Y100, early in the summer of 1994. I remember going to the Circuit City in Brandon, FL with my Mom to get the self titled "Blue Album" (the same place I got STP 'Core', Alice in Chains 'Jar of Flies', Nirvana 'In Utero') and Notorious B.I.G.'s 'Ready to Die'), and as we got home I had that thing peeled open ready for action. When I went in my room and put the CD on I knew these guys were something special. Having only heard "Undone: The Sweater Song" up to this point, hearing "My name is Jonas" open up the album let me know that these guys had good, raw power cords, a unique sounding frontman, and they didn't take themselves too seriously. Ever since then I have been a big fan and have had the opportunity to see them in concert twice. I truly do look forward to getting a chance to hear these new songs live, as 'Ratitude' is truly the culmination of what is great about music to me, and an obnoxiously massive peacock feather in the cap of the band's evolution. As it goes with most of Weezer's music, their most recent album plays off of that infectious, vintage Weezer sound millions have come to embrace; raw, garage like sound with short, intense riffs with a hint of punk, to the obvious influences of The Cars, Beatles, The Kinks and 50's rock n' roll. The first single from the album, "(If you're wondering if I want you) I Want You, was released in the summer of 2009 and is your typical Weezer album intro song; steady to fast paced, catchy, and really sets the tone for an album that you don't want or need to skip songs on. The ebb and flow is similar to that of Green Day's 'Dookie', No Doubt's 'Rock Steady' and more recently Wolfmother's "Self Titled" 2005 debut album; albums you can play from beginning to end at a house party w/friends, road trips or great house cleaning music. Some of the real standouts to me are "I'm your daddy" (#2), which also features Kenny G (seriously), "Let it all hang out" (#8) and "Get me some" (#11). All three songs are very Cars-esque to me, and are the songs that are the glue for the album; less experimental and maintaining that trademark Weezer sound that makes them an unmistakeable band. "Get me some" will undoubtably be the most successful song from the masterpiece because of it's radio friendly, familiar Weezer sound (a la "Hash Pipe", "Buddy Holly", "The Good Life", "Pork n' Beans" and "Beverly Hills") that people have come to expect and can count on. Other tracks, like "Can't stop partyin" feat. L'il Wayne and co-produced by Jermaine Dupri show how they are trying to evolve their sound, and they do it masterfully! The sampling and tweaking of their trademark sound is subtle, and Weezy F. Baby's spoken work contribution was a great addition to a solid song. Not to mention, it marked the second time I understood what the hell that dude was saying (first being a suprisingly impressive appearance on ESPN's PTI), and when I heard he was releasing a rock album, I was far more open to the idea of actually listening to it. Another impressive suprise was "Love is the answer" (#7), which was originally part of Rivers' solo effort, and was recorded by Sugar Ray on their most recent travesty. Weezer reclaimed it and hit one out of the park, from the girl in the chorus to the Sitar sounds made famous by Ravi Shankar, it was very fresh sound to add to their repetoire. Just a sweet, geeky love song. And finally, while on the subject of sweet, geeky love songs, there is "I don't wanna let you go" (#8). Keeping with their often 50's bluegrass undertones, it sounds like a song that would have been a #1 hit for Richie Valens. Just overall a supherb project and kudos to all who were a part of putting it together. I'm just sayin'... So, what do you think of 'Ratitude?' How does it stack up to their other albums? How would you rate the band as far as your favorites? Let's talk about it.

What drives me.

Welcome back to the world I created for us all. If this is your first time, thanks for stopping by. As you can see at the top of the page, there are weekly polls listed that will be the underlying theme for each week. I figured for the launch of the blog, it be important to touch on what inspires us all to become the person we aim to be. For me personally, my poll selection was 'family' for several reasons that will be touched on in this post.

It would probably be grossly understated that my life has been less than ordinary for the 3+ decades I have been breathing. All decisions or actions taken in life have contributed in getting me to where I am today; for better or worse. We all have different reasons for doing the things we do to reach levels of success in life, and through the coarse of time I could honestly say that depending on the time I would have selected any one of the choices listed in the poll. For so long, I was a firm believer that the benchmark for success in life was how much money you made and how you were percieved by the masses. A great deal of this logic is because of the way society is portrayed in the media, and this is unlikely to ever change. From the world of sports, where contracts are so ridiculously inflated (and negotiations are highly publicized), to music/music videos (where you are taught that you aren't living unless you have a refrigerator dedicated to only overrated and overpriced Champagne and a garage full of luxury cars) to general paparazzi pop culture (yes, the same parasites that turned Paris Hilton into a celebrity and percieved role model for young women), the everyday honest working man mentallity is looked down upon and a hard days' work is considered low class. For these reasons, it is completely up to us to sift through the bullshit and establish our own beliefs of what is most important in our personal lives. There are some people who use that type of success to inspire them to be more, and I am certainly not putting them down for the work that they put into what they do, because a CEO of a Fortune 500 company likely had to bust their ass and step on alot of toes to create the life they now have. But, it leaves others to not always reach for the same goals, but to project that image which is complete fodder if you ask me. Even if you don't ask me, I'll say it because I did it when I was younger, too! My friend Dave Everitt once made referrence to our generation as "We wear Diesel Jeans, Prada shoes and Movado watches but don't have any gas in our car or more than $5 to put in it...need that money to go out!" We laughed, but he was balls on accurate with the description. This truly is the status quo for the everyday person, and I was once one of them. Fortunately for me, I realized that this simply wasn't the life for me. I had worked so hard to be something other than me that I lost what was most important to me, many friends and my family. The people that I was honestly working so hard for to include in this grandeur life I was searching for were completely lost in the shuffle.

My aspirations for global dominance, coupled with a nasty drug habit for many years made me a very difficult person to count on in a personal way. Professionally I was clutch because I thought that was the only way to get where I wanted to be, and in the process would eventually ostricize all those who truly mattered. Though I was present in many of these peoples' lives and would do anything for them in my power, I always seemed to come up short when it truly mattered. By my mid twenties I had achieved many goals set for myself; had a successful business, cleaned up my substance abuse issues and developed a reputation in my field as a machine. I was also very lonely and had noone to thank for that but myself, so the real soul searching began. My love for people made me push them away when I knew the last thing they needed around was a self destructive asshole like myself, so how do you go back to people who you had lied to, seen you at your worst, or just completely burned one way or another??? Well, the answer is diffrent for everyone; some people don't have that opportunity afforded to them, some are welcomed back with open arms-no questions asked, and others have to earn it. I was humbled and proud to have earned back many people in my life lost, and in reality, earning that was the only way I would have wanted things. After all, work was the only thing I was really good at, and the greatest job of my life has been proving to many that they were right to have ever invested themselves in me emotionally, and I wasn't completely comprimised after all (a la Darth Vader! hahaha).

Because of all these trials and tribulations, I got to see that people in my life always knew that my passion and ambition, which were often lost in translation, didn't fall on deaf ears, and people understood that my intentions were always good. They let me back into their lives slowly but surely, and for that my personal and professional life has soared ever since. I have a good career that grants me the financial freedom to do many things in life, a part time bartending job that I enjoy (most of the time) and friends and family that give me the confidence to be myself and realize anything worth having isn't worth having if you are alone. Again, for some people out there, the reassurance of making a million bagillion dollars and 'taking over' (a term alot of people use in my professional circle) is what they want out of life, and more power to them if that's how they aspire to be great. But for me, I look forward to starting my own family one day sooner than later, and sharing my experiences thus far to make a great life of good health, comfortable wealth, and absolute happiness. Until then, I have a brother who is doing really special things as a student/athlete @ Villanova Univ. and a sister who keeps me on my toes and is preparing me for life with daughters. But that is another topic, for another day. I'm just sayin'...

So how about all of you???

Welcome to the fold.

Salutations, my fellow humans, and thanks for stopping by my blog. This blog is an extension of a series of blogs that will cover many aspects of our day to day lives. The others in my family of blogs include "The Not So Awesome Files"-which ultimately will be a collection of rants which I have become known for in my circles, and also "The Travelling Chowdown"-a look into current dining/nightlife trends, best kept secrets revealed, and go to places in many cities across the world during your travels. As the construction of the ladder two are completed, I will let everyone know.

As stated in the description, the aim of this blog, 'The Awesome Files' is to touch on things that are great about the world. I am a very random person, and have many interests and opinions that will be touched on. We can go from one post discussing acts of philanthropy abroad to how incredibly awesome and diverse the music of the 1970's was in the next post. Nothing shed in a positive light is taboo here, and the idea is to get all of you talking and contributing as well. Tell myself, and others how you feel about topics discussed and if the focal point of the post hits close to home, great! For me, anytime you get a chance to bring people together for a common cause, whether we are all agreeing wholeheartedly, or jousting in a fine battle of wits, the idea is we are talking and interacting. I believe life is about three things (very generalized, so don't read too much into it): Presentation, Making connections and how you deal with adversity. Like Rick Ocaseck of The Cars once said, "let the good times roll!"